Saturday, October 24, 2009

Baby Shower/Mother Blessing

Baby Shower/Mother Blessing

Recently, I was given a baby shower by two dear friends of mine, Janice and Christina (who is Penelope’s Godmother) and I had such a wonderful time. I had been looking forward to my shower since my first trimester. It was at Janice’s house and her house is absolutely gorgeous. It was decorated to the nines with fall décor. Fall is my favorite time of year and I love fall decorations, so it’s very fitting that Penelope is arriving this fall! It was a small group but it was so nice, I got to spend quality time with everyone there and I knew that everyone that was there truly loved me and Penelope.
After we ate some yummy food, they did a mother blessing for me. Everyone gathered, standing in a circle. My friend Missy had a ball of yarn, and started the ceremony. She told everyone that when the ball of yarn comes to you, say a piece of advice or a loving blessing and then to pass the ball of yarn across the circle to another person. In the end, we created a web with the yarn, a web of support. Then Missy cut pieces of the yarn and had everyone tie a piece around their wrist or ankle to wear until baby Penelope arrives. When they look at their piece of yarn they are reminded to continually send love and support our way. It was such a simple act, only took about 15 minutes, but it will be something I remember for the rest of my life.

Mother Blessings or Blessingways are simply the name of a ceremony. According to Anna Stewart, author of Mother Blessings-Honoring Women becoming Mothers, cultures across the world mark special events- menses, marriage, childbirth, war, journeys, death – with ceremonies and rituals. They provide a formal way to understand the changes a person is in the midst of. They bring us together to celebrate, honor, and support our loved ones.

Through creating an intentional ceremony, rich with personal significance, family and friends offer their heartfelt blessings as they create a physical symbol of their wishes. Mother blessings focus on giving emotional support, commitment to being in community with the new family, and a deeper appreciation for the life change that follows a baby’s arrival. We need ceremonies to remind us of these transitions.

In Grandmothers of the Light, Paula Gunn Allen talks about birth being the most important event in a woman’s life. It is her ticket into the adult women’s world. Allen writes, “Having traversed the borderland between life and death in childbirth, she is welcomed and instructed in the woman’s way, she learns the discipline of sacrifice- her body, time, nutrients, psyche, knowledge, skills, social life, relationships, spiritual knowledge and values are called into the service of her children. This passage pushes her to reach beyond whatever limits she thought she labored within, making her stronger and wiser.”

Becoming a mother, is absolutely one the biggest event of our lives and we deserve more than a few congrats and baby gifts. We deserve (at least as much as we need) to be honored for this incredible journey. I feel so blessed to have such wonderful friends that have honored my journey towards motherhood.

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